I will admit that ... read on, Fisherboy »]]>

Leonardo da Vinci - Study of Human Skull

Leonardo da Vinci was a great artist and inventor, and it was said he was a great genius. The Boston Museum of Science (as well as many others, but I figured I’d give you a real reference!) said that “Leonardo’s interests were so broad, and he was so often compelled by new subjects, that he usually failed to finish what he started.” This little factoid about da Vinci is why my husband thinks I’m a genius, and why every boss I’ve ever had thinks I’m incompetent.

I will admit that I do have some similarities to Leonardo da Vinci, as I’m sure a lot of other people have (I love my hubby, and he’s so sweet, but just because I have a few similarities doesn’t make me a genius): I start a lot of things and never finish them. I get swept up in learning something new, and if something else new comes along before I finish new #1, I’ll drop the ball on it. I’ve always done that.

I’ve always said that if I could choose my perfect “dream job” for myself, if I could do anything I wanted to do, without any limits or restrictions, my perfect “job” would be to become a permanent student. As the illustrious Trent Reznor once penned: “I wanna go everywhere, I wanna do everything… I wanna do something that matters.”

Yes, I left out a little bitty line, because that particular one doesn’t really apply.

There is so much to know and to learn, I just don’t know how anyone could ever want to stop. I love learning new things. I love trying things out. And honestly, I don’t mind failure. I learn the most from my failures. Although I’d love to “do it right the first time,” I never expect I will – I always expect I’ll fail the first time. That’s okay with me.

Right now, I’m finding myself on a creative streak. I think it’s because I’ve finally finished all of the at-work projects (that were supposed to be completed October 1) and I truly find myself finally enjoying my sabbatical. I have a lot of time on my hands – and as expected, at first I had no idea what I was going to do. So I started cleaning. That didn’t last long (I have 2 kids under the age of 6. They sort of followed along right behind me and messed up what I’d just cleaned.), so I started focusing on my knitting projects. Which led to sewing projects.

Last night, I was up until 1am, sketching out bag designs. I’ve become bag-obsessed over the last month. My sketchbook is becoming filled with ideas, and I want to make them all. I was going to fabric sites on the internet and picking out fabrics and notions I wanted to use in my designs. (I so wanted to hit that “add to cart” button on one of them…) My husband is becoming worried about the size of my “stash” – both fabric and yarn.

Now I’m a genius with an addictive personality. (To which I said, “At least it’s not alcohol or gambling.”)

What gets me is, I hate bags. If you ever met me on the street, you would see that I do not carry one. I haven’t since high school, when I had two purses stolen, right off me. (Oh, and a third that was taken from my car. And the one at the hotel bar – that a year later my driver’s license was returned to me, but all my credit cards and cash were not.) I carry the necessities in my pocket. I’ve yet to be pickpocketed though, which is probably why I feel safer with it in my jeans than I do in something hanging on a strap off my shoulder.

And yet, here I am, designing them in my little sketchbook – over and over. I can’t get them out of my mind, and I want to make every single one of them. But then what the hell would I do with them?

Then we move back to knitting. OMG – patterns are like sex to me. (okay, maybe not like sex…. more like chocolate, I guess.) I go through pattern after pattern and wonder, can I knit that up in a night? Then I start trying to do someone else’s pattern and find myself altering it. Not for resizing or anything, but seriously changing it into something brand-new. Then again, I find myself wanting to knit everything I see – but what would I do with it all?

So I stop, and wait, and sketch, and wonder.

And procrastinate.

Right now, I’m at the point in my creativity where the proverbial smoke comes pouring out of my ears. I have so many ideas right now, my hands are developing carpal tunnel from trying to keep up, and I’m burning paper by sketching so fast. And the procrastination comes in because I don’t know where to begin, nor do I know what I would do with all of it once I’ve finished a project.

You know. If I do.